I can't help it.... I just do... I don't know how or why I just do...
I don't know how to fix myself or find my way.
I'm not good at dating, I'm not good at anything but loving my people and Wylie and Sadie :(
I'm lost.... I'm strong, but I'm alone.
A mans touch is nice but I get ahead of myself. I expect too much. I'm too needy I feel.
I have issues.... Major issues and that's hard to admit and own up too.
I let something go that was special, not typical for me, but special in its own way.
I self destruct.
I let my guard down and opened my arms expecting too much. I'm a hopeless romantic but a realist.
I'm lost. I have everything but nothing but companionship. I lost that yesterday. Not purposely just out of needing more. I need to work on myself.
I don't miss my old life, I embrace my new life, it's just weird....
I want to be a good person, I want to love to my max and I did and it bit me in the ass.
I needed too much.
Why do I need anything from anyone? I don't know but I do. My heart is empty, my soul is full with love from my dogs and family but my heart is empty ;(
It will get better, they tell me, you will be ok.....
I live with demons....
I love and hate my demons but they are mine, and mine to use as I wish.
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